Newcastle 3-2 Qarabag (9-3 agg): Magpies soar into Champions League last-16 for first time ever after joyride against mannequins of Azerbaijan

They call this the punishment round, yet for Newcastle it has been more like a mid-season joyride. Not so for poor Qarabag, and you can interpret ‘poor’ however you wish.

It was hard not to feel a flicker of sympathy for them at times in the first half, and perhaps for Anthony Gordon too. He plundered four in last week’s 6-1 win in Baku and might have overtaken Kylian Mbappe as the Champions League’s leading scorer with another four had he been unleashed from the start. It really was that easy during an opening six minutes that brought another two goals.

Thereafter, Eddie Howe’s side found cruise control, conserving energy and stockpiling confidence, at least until half-time. The head coach has complained about the calendar not allowing for meaningful training time – well, here he had it, against the mannequins of Azerbaijan.

Sandro Tonali’s late-winter resurgence again warmed supporters spooked by talk of a summer exit. Nick Woltemade, the £69million striker, enjoyed another midfield tutorial, although Howe admitted he did not impact enough. Alongside the German, Joelinton sharpened fitness and added a fine goal. His athletic volley came just a minute after Tonali had initiated and finished a move to open the scoring.

There was a Qarabag reply early in the second half when Camilo Duran raced clear and slotted beneath Aaron Ramsdale, drawing polite applause from the home crowd, but Sven Botman soon headed in from a Kieran Trippier corner at the other end. 

There followed a brief spell where the hosts lost focus, much to Howe’s annoyance, and Elvin Jafarguliyev turned in the rebound after Ramsdale had saved Marko Jankovic’s penalty. At least Qarabag’s sudden arrival in the tie quickened the tempo of the training exercise during the final half hour.

Joelinton netted the second on what was a comfortable second leg for the Magpies 

Now for Barcelona or Chelsea in the last 16, where Newcastle will compete for the first time in their history. If they are to play in this competition next season, it might just be that winning this year’s edition becomes their most viable route. They are nine points off fifth in the Premier League and the field in front of them is crowded. 

As Howe said this week, his team seem to find something extra under the Champions League lights. Results support that theory, but so does the fact English clubs are so much stronger than the vast majority of what exists on the continent. 

Barcelona won 2-1 here on the opening night of the group phase but Newcastle battered them in the first half hour. There is an argument to say Barcelona would be the preferred opponents in Friday’s draw, given the likely physical edge.

Gordon scored in that defeat in September, but it came at a time when Newcastle were struggling for goals. With the winger as striker of late, they have found rhythm and belief in front of goal. His 10 in Europe are double the tally of Marcus Rashford, who netted both of Barcelona’s goals in the autumn. Newcastle would not, and should not, be daunted by the prospect of facing the Spanish champions.

‘There will be a positive feel whoever we get,’ said Howe. ‘I believe we can raise our game and compete with anyone. We’ve seen the best of ourselves in cup games. The Champions League is an amazing thing for us. We will attack everything.’

Tonali was the game’s best player here. Of the very small number of potential suitors for the Italian, Barcelona would probably be one. But, for now and until the end of the season at least, he will be orchestrating Newcastle’s midfield. 

His jinking run in the fourth minute led to his close-range finish moments later, making it three goals from three games. In the absence of injured skipper Bruno Guimaraes, Tonali has re-emerged as the team’s leading man.

Sven Botman headed the third, with Eddie Howe’s men progressing 9-3 on aggregate

Anthony Gordon made an impact off the bench and kept up his recent momentum 

Gordon, too, was electric when he came on early in the second half, no doubt motivated by that quest for goals. He makes no secret of his desire to outscore the likes of Mbappe, evidenced by a row with Trippier when he insisted on taking a second penalty to score his fourth in the first leg.

There was a late scare when Tonali was caught on the shin by a clumsy Qarabag leg – at the cost of a booking – but within a minute he was back on his feet and charging the length of the field to deny the visitors what would have felt the most unlikely equaliser.

And so the joyride ended with plenty of gas in the tank and feel-good restored. This was no punishment round. If anything, it has Newcastle dreaming of the pleasure that could yet await.